random ramblings

i know it's been a long time since i started blogging. there's been too much going on.



lately, ive been doing alot of thinking. i just keep wondering what's the use of this blog here. there a number things i would realy wanna write it down but becoz of not hurting ppl's feeling..i dont ..



gotta start with this. started skype during the holidays and since then, i met this girl in australia and some other friends.. from all the world and kirra, the girl.. she's real nice.. she's a doctor...jonathan..has the cutest british accent. he's from london! lovy dovy!!!..



ivin's coming over later to hang out at the park..

*2 hours later

came bak from the park with ivin..saw a few little new born puppies.. they're lyk omg the cutest thing i've ever seen in my life! ><>

dad and i still havent talk. everyone just fucking assumes everything's gona be alright! well , IT WONT!
i dont know what's the problem here.ppl just argh.. i sooo hate it now! im full of rage and anger right now. i dont know how to control and also express my angers and feelings to anyone!

i just wanna get this 5 months over and get 2 months off at home. i cant wait for it to happen. i need it! many shits has happen. ppl that i care bout are leaving me. everyone's changing. the one guy whom i can trust, dont see to be able to anymore, dad and i hate each other, fell for someone but getting the heart broken, watching someone else taking someone i care about away. Arghh n soo much more. i just cant finish writing them.

i just feel lyk any minute now im about to lose it. everything seems even out of place than before. before i met u, at least i wasnt doing this.. at least i wasnt sulking much.. now i just cant stop thinking bout it. ur always on my mind no matter how freakkin hard i tried to get u off it. ur always everywhere. wheverer i go, wherever i am, ppl just reminds me of you. its either ur name pops up sumwhere or sumones says ur name. i just cant take it anymore. i dont know why!

anywayz had alot of fun with kirra and chris on skype! u guys are the most amazing audience ever!! love love love <3>